A Growth Mindset

Hello Everyone,

My four year old daughter is learning to tie her shoes. This weekend, as we were leaving the house, she  said to me that she will never be able to get it. How often do we hear this sort of thing from our kids (I am not good at _______, I will never be able to _________, I am not a math ‘person’ etc). What we are hearing is an example of a fixed mindset, the belief that our abilities cannot change. The development of a growth mindset, the belief that our abilities can change is an essential skill for children and adults alike and one that teachers in school spend a great deal of time nurturing. Furthermore,the effects of holding these two differing mindsets are dramatic.

If we believe we can not change our innate abilities, these beliefs lead to a loss of confidence, depressive feelings, and a desire to not try in the future. Of course, with a growth mindset the opposite is also true.

We don’t, however, have either a fixed mindset or a growth mindset. It’s not an either/or thing. Sometimes we have more of a fixed mindset and sometimes we have more of a growth mindset and a lot of things can affect this. So, the question becomes, how can we promote a growth mindset more often?

Language – Language is so important. Imagine how these statements feel different –

“I can’t do this” vs “I can’t do this…..yet“.

or in my case

“I am bad at tying my shoes!” with the response “We can learn to tie our shoes together, _______ showed me when I was your age”

There are some subtle uses of language here that have a profound impact on how we feel. The use of ‘yet’ is powerful in that it implies change is possible. Moreover, in the second example the use of ‘we’ instead of ‘you’ implies that change is collaborative and supportive. In other words, we can help support their learning and that growth is possible.

Celebrate Mistakes

Often in schools we celebrate mistakes and here language is important too. If mistakes are to be feared and avoided it leads to a reluctance to try new things, insecurity, and low self-esteem. However, if we highlight that mistakes are how we learn and grow  our kids will be more willing to try new things even if they are hard.

Adult Modelling 

Our children are watching us. They notice our feelings, as well as what we say and do. If they see us modelling a growth mindset they are more apt to embrace this mentality as we are showing them how. Most importantly, though, we are also showing them it is possible.

Some resources to support Growth Mindset are: