Hi all,
Aimee and I had a discussion on when it would be appropriate to let our future kids date. I said never, but she says that is unrealistic. But more realistically, I said they can start dating when they prove to me that they can be responsible … which I said would be around the age of 16. As long as the person they choose to date is respectful of the house rules, doing well in school, not involved with any drugs or criminal activities, and demonstrates care for my future child, then I think it would be fine. It’ll be tough for me to swallow when my child starts dating. If I have a daughter though, I know she WON’t date until she is 24 and ready to be married … right?
Here is an article I came across and then a comical YouTube video.
Being a parent means committing to guide your child through many complicated and difficult stages of life. You go from changing their diapers, to teaching them how to tie their shoes, to eventually helping them understand dating and love. The preteen and teen years aren’t easy on you or your child. As hormones fly, you can expect to deal with your fair share of conflict. So when it comes to dating, how can you prepare yourself to deal with potential questions and issues? And what age is appropriate? The American Academy of Pediatrics notes that on average, girls begin dating as early as 12 and a half years old, and boys a year older. But it may not be the kind of “dating” you’re picturing.
Define Dating:
You may be surprised to hear dating labels like “boyfriend,” “girlfriend,” and “together” from the lips of your sixth-grader. At this age, it probably means your son or daughter is sitting next to a special someone at lunch or hanging out at recess. Groups play a big role in relaying information about who likes whom. Even if your son is mooning over a certain girl, most 12-year-olds aren’t really ready for the one-on-one interaction of a true relationship. For eighth-graders, dating likely means lots of time spent texting or talking on the phone, sharing images on social media, and hanging out in groups. Some kids may have progressed to hand-holding as well. In high school, strong romantic attachments can be formed and things can get serious, fast.
Talking to Your Child:
When your child mentions dating, or a girlfriend or boyfriend, try to get an idea of what those concepts mean to them. Take note of how your child reacts when you discuss dating. It could be a little uncomfortable or embarrassing, but if your child is unable to even discuss it with you without getting defensive or upset, take that as a sign that they probably aren’t ready. Other things to consider include the following.
- Is your child really interested in someone in particular, or are they just trying to keep up with what friends are doing?
- Do you think your son or daughter would tell you if something went wrong?
- Is your child generally confident and happy?
- Does your child’s physical development match their emotional development?
Be aware that for many tweens and young teenagers, dating amounts to socializing in a group. While there may be interest between two in particular, it’s not double-dating so much as a group heading out or meeting up at the movies or the mall. This kind of group stuff is a safe and healthy way to interact with members of the opposite sex without the awkwardness that a one-on-one scenario can bring. Think of it as dating with training wheels. So, when is a child ready for one-on-one dating? There’s no right answer. It’s important to consider your child as an individual. Consider their emotional maturity and sense of responsibility. For many kids, 16 seems to be an appropriate age, but it may be entirely suitable for a mature 15-year-old to go on a date, or to make your immature 16-year-old wait a year or two. You can also consider what other parents are doing. Are lots of kids the same as yours already dating in the true sense of the word?
Discussion Question:
What age do you think is appropriate to start dating? Please support your claims with examples and all.
I think a good age is 16-17 because most teens might be mature by them and know how to handle a relationship. Why I think that is because In the younger ages they don’t really have a true relationship because they don’t really like each other and commit to a full relationship.
I think a good age is 16-17 because most teens might be mature by them and know how to handle a relationship. Why I think that is because In the younger ages they don’t really have a true relationship because they don’t really like each other and commit to a full relationship.
I think kids could start dating at 16 or 17, as long as they show that they are mature and responsible enough, but if your child is just dating ‘for fun’ or just to ‘try it out’ I don’t think you should allow them.
In my opinion, people should only date people that they are really interested in.
So yeah!
Have a niiiiiiccceee day.
I think 13 is pretty early. I wouldn’t date until my parents are okay with it. the reasonable age i would give is probably 14-15 years old. that is the age kids are mostly getting out of puberty.
BTW it is Pavyn
pavynpanglee@gmail.com
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15, 15 is a good age becuase the child should be mature enough to date and its not to early and its not to old and it should be a good age to go out by themselves.
Umm… My opinion is to NOT start dating until your like fifteen or something.
I think people should start dating at 15-16 at the earliest.
I would only date when it is something serious, not like “I just found out I have romantic feelings for you let’s date!” But, it’s also up to the parents. My parents would have to approve of everything before anything happens. Soooooo, yeah. That’s it…..
I don’t know when kids should start dating. But, I know that 13 is pretty early. I know that my parents would never approve dating at 13. They had told me that I couldn’t date until I have a proper education. Which I can not argue with that statement because I want to have a good education and end up getting a good job. in my opinion though I think that kids could start dating around 15-16.
i think that 13 is way to early and my parents won’t let me date for a long time. the time to start dating should be 18 to 19 because you will be more responsible.
BTW its Luca
I think like 15-16 is probably a fair age. My brother had a “girlfriend” in grade 7 and even when I was 7 I could tell it wasn’t real dating. Than my brother started dating his first real girlfriend that he’s still with now when he was 16 so that seems like a pretty common age than people will say.
I think the most reasonable age for someone to start dating would be 17-18. But some parents think that their children should focus on school and so they want them to finish university before actually dating. But I actually think that students should focus on school because someone I know had been dating someone for about 2 years and this person would talk with her boyfriend by video call every single day. She hasn’t really focused on school much and that is kinda true how some parents don’t want their child to date when they are still students.
I think a good age to start dating is probably beetween the age of 16 – 20 because then your child is probably mature enough and responsible enough so you are able to trust them.